One was an elderly single preacher, and the other was a divorced sister with children. They initially did not see eye-to-eye on anything. With the help of church pastors, they chose to submit to the Lord's will to build a united family. Their family has experienced a special blessing from the Lord, reflecting a marriage that glorifies Him.
Recently, Brother Da Yong and Sister Yu Jie shared their marriage testimony together on an online platform.
Da Yong was 36 years old when he got married. He had known Sister Yu Jie for a long time in church but was not well acquainted with her. The pastor also matched them, but they didn't think that they fited each other.
Besides the pastor, the church elders also brought up the issue of their getting married. Da Yong began to take this to heart and pray about it. He liked to exercise by running around West Lake in the morning. One day he prayed to the Lord and said, "Lord, if I see her while running for three days in a row, I will know this person is the one you have prepared for me, and it is your will." Da Yong recalled that at that time, he rarely saw Sister Yu running.
While he was running back, Sister Yu came out for a run, and he came across her for three consecutive days.
Sister Yu later said that she rarely went for a run. It was very difficult for her to go because the child do not like getting up in the morning, but it happened that she took the child out for a run on those days. Interestingly, she felt that the duration of time she continued her daily running exercise was probably just one or two days longer than Brother Da's prayer time for God's will.
It was still a bit difficult for Da Yong, a full-time preacher, to accept a divorced sister with children. But the pastor and elders kept matching, and one pastor, who was moved by the situation, flew in from thousands of miles away to help them confirm their relationship.
The sister also struggled for a long time. She said, "Previously, I was married and experienced infidelity by my ex-husband; this hit me hard. Although it was not diagnosed, I knew I was prone to depression after the divorce, so I was afraid of marriage for a long time and was prepared to be celibate, according to Paul's teachings. My perception was that it was better for me to remain celibate in my situation. Remarriage was in conflict with my firmly held beliefs, so I did not want to get married. But in prayer, God gave me a word: His mercy triumphs over judgment. Due to this word, I was relieved of my obsession with celibacy."
"I struggled from Easter until October, until the teacher we both knew came all the way from out of town and said he was moved to confirm our marriage, and by then it became clear in my heart that this was God's will," she recalls.
"This teacher from out of town became different; he used to be supportive of me being celibate, but he changed his mind and flew in specially to make the marriage happen. I believe that could not have happened if it was not God's will."
The relationship was confirmed in October, and the two were married on Christmas Day that same year at the urging of their pastor.
"The love that comes from Christ lasts longer, and he has healed me of the hurts from my previous marriage. Although others see me as optimistic, I was hurting inside. Often, I would wake up in the middle of the night crying and desiring death. It was not fair to my husband that I went into this marriage with the hurt of my past, but he chose to accept it. Especially during the first six months of my marriage, he cried with me and listened to my suffering. He did not make a single accusation during this process; he gave me time, but instead of letting me wallow in my pain, he saved me from a state of death. Through him, God has given me a beautiful life, and I now live with hope. The desire to die is completely gone."
Brother Da Yong added, "Actually, I did not do anything; I listened when she spoke. When she cried, I passed a tissue, and after she cried, I gave her a hug, patted her back, and we prayed together. I believe it was the Lord's love leading the way; otherwise, which person in their right mind can understand when faced with someone who just got married and asked to die?"
Under the acceptance and companionship of her husband, Sister Yu Jie's life is moving towards maturity, and she believes it is Christ who is doing the healing work through her husband. Sister Yu also stressed that acceptance is not the same as unprincipled pampering, and she was grateful that her husband did not accommodate her bad temper. She was thankful that her brother did not give in to her bad temper because he did not love her with the love of men and women but with the love of Christ.
Between their marriage on Christmas Day 2019 and this year, 2023, they have not quarreled and have rarely even had conflicts.
To develop a sweet marriage relationship, they believe they have done only one thing, which is to follow the command of the Bible: Husbands love their wives, and wives submit to their husbands. Da Yong loves according to God's truth; Yu Jie, who originally had a strong personality, is willing to put aside her desire to be in control and submit, even giving her husband control of the family finances. She concluded, "We walk in the truth, and God's blessing is on our marriage."
Before they got married, she also knew little about raising children and had fears about having children. But now they have a child together who is over one year old, and another is in the process of being conceived. The sister now enjoys spending time with and educating their children. Both husband and wife believe that their children are the Lord's property, so they want to educate them well and hand them over to the Lord. Her eldest daughter has a very cheerful personality and loves her new father.
The other evangelists asked how both of them, being evangelists, would cope with the financial pressure. Brother Da replied, "I experienced poverty and could not afford to pay my living expenses when I was attending theological school. But I believe that the descendants of the righteous do not beg for bread. Now that we have a family of six, we need to take care of our parents and raise our children—the older one is on formula milk and the younger one is in his mother's womb. My wife is optimistic because she does not care about money and does not worry too much. I overthink, but God's provision is enough."
"Our finances are planned, and we do not buy unnecessary things. Before we got married, I used to say to my wife, "To get married to me, you must be prepared to love white rice," he said.
Sister Yu Jie added: "Brother Da Yong used to work as a cook; I am a good cook myself; and we used to love food. But now that we often do spiritual retreats, pray, and worship God together, we do not seem to have such a strong desire for material things anymore. By God's grace, we live a simple life and are totally enjoying it. However, things that are needed at home are being acquired, and we have enough money to be filial to our parents."
Da Yong also exhorted young preachers' families who were worried about this, "After the pandemic, many preachers were not paid salaries. Let us not look at how much the church sends us and trust that God has an extra provision. Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all that you need will be added to you. In all honesty, when we first started having children, we had concerns. But it all takes practice, and the truth is that God did not make it difficult for us."
(This article contains pseudonyms.)
- Translated by Nonye Nancy
一个是大龄单身传道人，一个是离异带孩子的姐妹，他们本来彼此没有看上。在教会牧者的撮合下，选择顺服主的旨意建立了合一的家庭。他们在家庭当中经历了主特别的祝福，给我们看到了一个荣耀主的婚姻。
近日，大勇弟兄和玉洁姐妹在网络平台一同分享他们婚姻的见证。
大勇是一名传道人，结婚那年是36岁。大勇弟兄早在教会中跟玉洁姐妹认识，但并不熟悉。牧者也撮合，但是互相看不上对方。
但是不只一位牧者提，教会长老也提。大勇开始把这事放在心上，然后就开始为此祷告。大勇弟兄喜欢早上在西湖边跑步锻炼身体。有一天，他就祷告主说，“主啊，如果连续三天让我在跑步的时候看见她，这个人就是你为我预备的，就是你的旨意。”大勇弟兄回忆，那时候其实很少看到玉洁姐妹跑步。
当大勇弟兄跑步快结束，跑回来的时候，玉洁姐妹出来跑步了，并且连续三天都遇见了。
玉洁姐妹后来说，其实自己很少跑步的。因为小孩子早上不爱起床，所以能出去跑步是非常难的。但是偏偏那几天都有带孩子去跑步。有意思的是，她觉得自己坚持跑步的时间可能比大勇弟兄祷告的时间可能也就多一两天。
对于大勇弟兄来说，一个传道人找一个离异带孩子的姊妹，还是有点难接受。但是牧师和长老不断撮合，还有一位牧者有感动专门从千里之外乘飞机过来，帮他们确认关系。
姊妹也挣扎了很久。她说，“在此之前，我有过一段婚姻，经历过前夫外遇，这个打击比较大。虽然没有确诊，但我知道自己离婚后是有抑郁倾向的。所以我很长一段时间是恐婚的，并且按照保罗的教导，我也做好了要独身的准备。我的观念是，我这种情况还是独身比较好。再婚与我坚守的观念是冲突的，因此我并不想结婚。但祷告的时候，上帝给我一句话，他的怜悯是向审判夸胜的。因为这句话，我就释然了，不再执着于守独身。”
她回忆，“我一直从复活节挣扎到10月份，直到那位我们共同认识的老师专程从外地过来，他说他有感动要确定我们的婚姻，当时我心里已经清楚了这就是上帝的旨意。”
“这位外地的老师很不一样，他从前是支持我独身下去的。但是他改变了自己的想法，特意坐飞机过来要促成这段婚姻。我相信如果没有上帝的旨意，是做不到的。”
10月份确定关系，同年的圣诞节，两个人在牧者的催促下就举行了婚礼。
“从基督而来的爱更长久，他治愈了我过去婚姻中的伤害。虽然别人看我很乐观，但是我心里是伤痛的。常常半夜哭醒，想要求死。我带着过去的伤害进入这段婚姻，其实这对他不公平，但是他选择接纳。尤其是刚结婚的前半年中，他陪我流了不知道多少眼泪，听了我多少苦楚。这个过程中他没有一句指责，他给我时间，但他没有让我沉浸在痛苦当中，而是把我从死亡状态中拯救出来。上帝借着他给了我一个很美的生命，我现在活着有盼望。想死的意念完全没有了。”
大勇弟兄补充道：“其实我也没做什么，她说的时候，我就听。她哭的时候，我就递张纸巾，哭完，就抱一抱，拍一拍，一起祷告一下。我相信是主的爱在带领，不然的话，面对一个刚刚结婚就要求死的人，正常人，谁能理解呢？”
在弟兄的接纳和陪伴中，玉洁姐妹的生命走向成熟，她相信是基督在当中借着弟兄做治愈的工作。玉洁姐妹也强调说，接纳不等于无原则地宠爱，她很感谢弟兄没有迁就自己的坏脾气。因为弟兄不是用男女之爱在爱%E
见证| 一位大龄单身传道人与一位离异带娃姊妹的甜美婚姻之路
One was an elderly single preacher, and the other was a divorced sister with children. They initially did not see eye-to-eye on anything. With the help of church pastors, they chose to submit to the Lord's will to build a united family. Their family has experienced a special blessing from the Lord, reflecting a marriage that glorifies Him.
Recently, Brother Da Yong and Sister Yu Jie shared their marriage testimony together on an online platform.
Da Yong was 36 years old when he got married. He had known Sister Yu Jie for a long time in church but was not well acquainted with her. The pastor also matched them, but they didn't think that they fited each other.
Besides the pastor, the church elders also brought up the issue of their getting married. Da Yong began to take this to heart and pray about it. He liked to exercise by running around West Lake in the morning. One day he prayed to the Lord and said, "Lord, if I see her while running for three days in a row, I will know this person is the one you have prepared for me, and it is your will." Da Yong recalled that at that time, he rarely saw Sister Yu running.
While he was running back, Sister Yu came out for a run, and he came across her for three consecutive days.
Sister Yu later said that she rarely went for a run. It was very difficult for her to go because the child do not like getting up in the morning, but it happened that she took the child out for a run on those days. Interestingly, she felt that the duration of time she continued her daily running exercise was probably just one or two days longer than Brother Da's prayer time for God's will.
It was still a bit difficult for Da Yong, a full-time preacher, to accept a divorced sister with children. But the pastor and elders kept matching, and one pastor, who was moved by the situation, flew in from thousands of miles away to help them confirm their relationship.
The sister also struggled for a long time. She said, "Previously, I was married and experienced infidelity by my ex-husband; this hit me hard. Although it was not diagnosed, I knew I was prone to depression after the divorce, so I was afraid of marriage for a long time and was prepared to be celibate, according to Paul's teachings. My perception was that it was better for me to remain celibate in my situation. Remarriage was in conflict with my firmly held beliefs, so I did not want to get married. But in prayer, God gave me a word: His mercy triumphs over judgment. Due to this word, I was relieved of my obsession with celibacy."
"I struggled from Easter until October, until the teacher we both knew came all the way from out of town and said he was moved to confirm our marriage, and by then it became clear in my heart that this was God's will," she recalls.
"This teacher from out of town became different; he used to be supportive of me being celibate, but he changed his mind and flew in specially to make the marriage happen. I believe that could not have happened if it was not God's will."
The relationship was confirmed in October, and the two were married on Christmas Day that same year at the urging of their pastor.
"The love that comes from Christ lasts longer, and he has healed me of the hurts from my previous marriage. Although others see me as optimistic, I was hurting inside. Often, I would wake up in the middle of the night crying and desiring death. It was not fair to my husband that I went into this marriage with the hurt of my past, but he chose to accept it. Especially during the first six months of my marriage, he cried with me and listened to my suffering. He did not make a single accusation during this process; he gave me time, but instead of letting me wallow in my pain, he saved me from a state of death. Through him, God has given me a beautiful life, and I now live with hope. The desire to die is completely gone."
Brother Da Yong added, "Actually, I did not do anything; I listened when she spoke. When she cried, I passed a tissue, and after she cried, I gave her a hug, patted her back, and we prayed together. I believe it was the Lord's love leading the way; otherwise, which person in their right mind can understand when faced with someone who just got married and asked to die?"
Under the acceptance and companionship of her husband, Sister Yu Jie's life is moving towards maturity, and she believes it is Christ who is doing the healing work through her husband. Sister Yu also stressed that acceptance is not the same as unprincipled pampering, and she was grateful that her husband did not accommodate her bad temper. She was thankful that her brother did not give in to her bad temper because he did not love her with the love of men and women but with the love of Christ.
Between their marriage on Christmas Day 2019 and this year, 2023, they have not quarreled and have rarely even had conflicts.
To develop a sweet marriage relationship, they believe they have done only one thing, which is to follow the command of the Bible: Husbands love their wives, and wives submit to their husbands. Da Yong loves according to God's truth; Yu Jie, who originally had a strong personality, is willing to put aside her desire to be in control and submit, even giving her husband control of the family finances. She concluded, "We walk in the truth, and God's blessing is on our marriage."
Before they got married, she also knew little about raising children and had fears about having children. But now they have a child together who is over one year old, and another is in the process of being conceived. The sister now enjoys spending time with and educating their children. Both husband and wife believe that their children are the Lord's property, so they want to educate them well and hand them over to the Lord. Her eldest daughter has a very cheerful personality and loves her new father.
The other evangelists asked how both of them, being evangelists, would cope with the financial pressure. Brother Da replied, "I experienced poverty and could not afford to pay my living expenses when I was attending theological school. But I believe that the descendants of the righteous do not beg for bread. Now that we have a family of six, we need to take care of our parents and raise our children—the older one is on formula milk and the younger one is in his mother's womb. My wife is optimistic because she does not care about money and does not worry too much. I overthink, but God's provision is enough."
"Our finances are planned, and we do not buy unnecessary things. Before we got married, I used to say to my wife, "To get married to me, you must be prepared to love white rice," he said.
Sister Yu Jie added: "Brother Da Yong used to work as a cook; I am a good cook myself; and we used to love food. But now that we often do spiritual retreats, pray, and worship God together, we do not seem to have such a strong desire for material things anymore. By God's grace, we live a simple life and are totally enjoying it. However, things that are needed at home are being acquired, and we have enough money to be filial to our parents."
Da Yong also exhorted young preachers' families who were worried about this, "After the pandemic, many preachers were not paid salaries. Let us not look at how much the church sends us and trust that God has an extra provision. Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all that you need will be added to you. In all honesty, when we first started having children, we had concerns. But it all takes practice, and the truth is that God did not make it difficult for us."
(This article contains pseudonyms.)
- Translated by Nonye Nancy
Testimony: Sweet Marriage Story of Elderly Single Preacher and Divorced Woman With Children
