The movie "Sister" grossed over 400 million at the box office, many people were moved!
This is another movie after "Hello Mum", that uses "family love" to eliminate social problems, which is also a pattern common to commercial movies. Maybe I easily tear up, not only was I moved, but I also felt sad.
All films with "women's issues" themes are eventually put in the container of "family love", and blood ties have naturally become "morally right". This is also a cultural shackle that women find difficult to break free from as a result of this arranged fate.
Well, not only women, but men are also poisoned by the "utilitarian" concept of inheriting the family line, and they eventually become "giant babies" who never grow up, which is the most persistent problem in Chinese marriages.
01
A pair of "siblings" are estranged because their parents were in a car accident, compelling the elder sister An Ran to face the choice between self-realization (attending graduate school in Beijing) and taking care of her 5-year-old brother. This is a realistic drama touching on the social problems of "male favoritism" and "second child", and also a "tear-jerking" emotional drama.
"Family love" is more than everything, no matter how sharp the "gender issue" is, it will return to the traditional emotional mode. However, how is the audience made to feel more "empathy"? That is, the elder sister who was insulted and deprived of childhood finally reconciled with herself and the past and chose "brotherly love".
Given the parents had left, the relationship between sister and brother could be restored because of responsibility and blood ties. The reason why Confucian ethics constructed by blood ties is so powerful is that it has been internalized into the ethical concept of the Chinese people. Although many people will complain and resist, in the end, they will unconsciously make choices. The so-called "conforming to fate" is living according to cultural customs.
02
In the film, An Ran's aunt was also an "elder sister". She was admitted to a famous university, while her brother was admitted to a technical secondary school. Their family could only afford to sponsor one child in school, so she gave up the chance to attend university for her brother. We can say that the family's resources were limited and skewed towards the male child, but when her younger brother had children, her mother asked her to give up her thriving career and go home to take care of her younger brother's children, which was a bit "over the line". It is clear that girls do not exist as independent individuals, but as "functional" members of the family. However, will the younger brothers protected by the family grow up to be accountable and responsible? They will only reproduce the same ideas in the next generation.
When An Ran was a girl, for her parents to give birth to a boy, she had to dress up as a disabled person. She was not only deprived of all the care, but her father altered her college entrance examination choice to make her take proper care of her younger brother. This kind of "utilitarian birth" and growth without love can only lead to bitterness and resentment. Parents raise boys not to love, but to carry on the family line. People are tools rather than ends, which is the toxin of this culture; and if women are unable to wake up and grow out of the shackles of this culture, they will also replicate this concept in the next generation.
Both An Ran's aunt and An Ran who swore to escape the fate of the previous generation, all fell into the trap of fate. Their lives had been arranged by the family, just living passively based on others' initiatives.
03
"Exalting blood ties" is no way out, because this kind of ethical relationship is set up according to the "father-son" rather than the "husband-wife" contractual relationship; therefore, there will be no real equality between "men and women". To break the shackles of blood ties and let "brotherly love" return to nature and equality, we need to break this kind of moral kidnapping and return to the source of love.
It is only to different degrees that An Ran is also influenced by these kind of cultural ethics. Therefore, I can understand the unfairness that An Ran, as a "sister", encounters. Parents do not educate boys to take more responsibility and protect women, but teach them to be taken care of by women in their families. How can such a man take care of his wife when he is married?
In the pursuit of commercial profits, movies often turn serious problems into sensational "tear gas".
But obviously, it is unrealistic to reflect on family ethics through films and television works. It is said that the original story of the film is even crueler. The elder sister sold her parents' house and abandoned her younger brother.
A few years ago, I read a very challenging passage in the Bible. It seemed as if He "neglected" his mother and brothers. It is He who extends the family relationship from blood relationship to a community of values, which is the way to achieve brotherhood without any family bond.
While Jesus was still talking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, wanting to speak to him. Someone told him, “Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you.”
He replied to him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.” (Matthew 12:46-50)
A relationship can be made stable only by transcending blood ties and building on truth and values. That explains why Western societies can achieve "universal love". They can adopt children from other countries and take care of orphans and sick children, rather than regard blood ties as the highest standard.
Without love and justice, it is just arranged, which can easily lead to resentment within the family and between people. Even if they are moved for a short time, it will be difficult to persist.
- Translated by Nonye Nancy
(This article was originally published in the "Manhua freedom" WeChat account; CCD reprinted with permission.)
《我的姐姐》票房过4亿，很多人喊被感动！
这是继《你好，李焕英》后，又一部用“亲情”来消弭社会问题的电影，也是商业电影的套路。可能是我的泪点太高了，非但没有被感动，还觉得悲凉。
所有打着“女性议题”的影片，最后都装在了“血缘亲情”这个容器里，血缘变成了天然的“道德正确”，这也是女性难以走出被安排命运的文化困境。
哦，不仅女性如此，男性也同样被继承家族血脉的“功利性”观念所毒害，他们最终都变成长不大的“巨婴”，这正是目前中国婚姻问题中最大的顽疾。
01
彼此疏远的一对“姐弟”，却因为父母遭遇车祸，让姐姐安然不得不面临实现自我（到北京读研）与照顾5岁的弟弟间做抉择，这是一部触及“重男轻女”、“二胎”社会问题的现实剧，同时又是一部“催泪”的情感剧。
“亲情”大于一切，无论“性别问题”多么尖锐，最后还是回到传统情感模式中。但怎么让观众更有“代入感”，那就是从小被凌辱、被剥夺的姐姐最后与自己、过去和解，选择“手足亲情”。
仿佛父母离开了，“姐弟关系就可以因责任和血缘”而更新。用血缘关系来建构的儒家伦理之所以这么强大，就在于它已经内化成了中国人的伦理观念。尽管很多人会抱怨、反抗，但最后又会不自觉去做出选择，所谓的顺应“命运”，就是活在一种文化习俗里。
02
影片中安然的姑妈也是"姐姐"，她考上了名牌大学，弟弟考上了中专，家里只能供一个孩子上学，于是她放弃了上大学把机会留给了弟弟。如果说这是家里的资源有限只能倾斜给男孩子，到后来她弟弟有了孩子，她母亲让她放弃正做得红火的事业回家照顾弟弟的孩子，这就有些“越线”了。显然女孩子不是作为独立的个人，而是家庭“功能性”的存在了。然而被家族保护的弟弟，他们会成长为有担当、有责任的人吗，他们只会复制同样的观念在下一代身上。
当安然是一个女孩子，为了父母能生男孩，她就要装扮成残疾人，不仅被剥夺所有的关爱，父亲随便窜改她的高考志愿，目的是为了她好方便照顾弟弟，这种“功利性的生养”和缺乏爱的成长，只能是苦毒、怨怼。父母生养男孩子的目的也不是为了爱，而是传承家族血脉。显然，人都是工具而非目的，这才是这种文化的毒素，如果女性的自我觉醒和成长走不出这种文化的枷锁，同样会复制这样的生养观念。
不管是安然的姑妈，还是要发誓逃脱上一代命运的安然，最后都落入到命运的圈套中。她们的人生一直就是被家里安排，只是一个被动，一个主动。
03
“高举血缘”是没有出路的，因为这种伦理关系是按照“父-子”来建构的伦理关系，而不是“夫-妻”的契约关系来建构，所以“男女”就不会存在真正的平等，要打破血缘关系的桎梏，让“亲情手足”回到自然、平等中，就要打破这种道德绑架，而是回到爱的源头中。
同样受这样的文化伦理影响，只是程度不同而已，所以，我能体会作为“姐姐”的安然所遭遇的不公平，父母不是教育男孩子更要担当，保护女性，而是要受到家里女性的照顾，这样的男性在婚姻生活中，他怎么会去照顾、体谅自己的妻子呢？
电影为了追求商业利润，多是把严肃问题变成煽情的催泪弹。
但显然靠影视作品来反思家庭伦理，文化习俗也不现实。据说电影的原型故事就更残酷。姐姐恰恰卖了父母的房子、弃养了弟弟。
倒是我在几年前，读到《圣经》里一段很具挑战性，他看似在“冷落”自己的母亲、弟兄，事实上，是他把亲情关系从血缘扩展到价值共同体上，这才是不以亲情做捆绑，但又能成全手足亲情的方式。
耶稣正与众人说话的时候，不料，他母亲和他的兄弟站在外边，要与他说话。有人告诉他，“看哪，你母亲和你弟兄站在外边，要与你说话。”他却回答那人说：“谁是我的母亲？谁是我的兄弟？”就伸手指着他的门徒说：“看！我的母亲，我的兄弟！凡遵行我天父意旨的人，就是我的兄弟、姐妹和母亲了。”
只有超越血缘亲情，建立在真理和价值观上的关系才是稳固的，所以，西方社会才能做到“博爱”，他们可以收养其他国家的孩子，照顾孤寡、病痛的孩子，而不是把血缘亲情看成是最高标准。
没有爱和公义，只是被安排，这很容易造成家庭内、人与人之间的怨恨，即或是有短暂的感动，也很难坚持下去。
本文原载于“曼话Freedom”微信号，本平台蒙允转载，不拥有版权。
https://www.christiantimes.cn/news/34665/%E8%A7%82%E5%BD%B1%E3%80%8A%E6%88%91%E7%9A%84%E5%A7%90%E5%A7%90%E3%80%8B%EF%BC%9A%E6%97%A0%E6%B3%95%E8%B5%B0%E5%87%BA%E8%A2%AB%E5%AE%89%E6%8E%92%E7%9A%84%E4%BA%BA%E7%94%9F%EF%BC%8C%E7%9C%9F%E7%9A%84%E6%9C%89%E4%BA%9B%E6%82%B2%E5%87%89
观影《我的姐姐》：无法走出被安排的人生，真的有些悲凉
The movie "Sister" grossed over 400 million at the box office, many people were moved!
This is another movie after "Hello Mum", that uses "family love" to eliminate social problems, which is also a pattern common to commercial movies. Maybe I easily tear up, not only was I moved, but I also felt sad.
All films with "women's issues" themes are eventually put in the container of "family love", and blood ties have naturally become "morally right". This is also a cultural shackle that women find difficult to break free from as a result of this arranged fate.
Well, not only women, but men are also poisoned by the "utilitarian" concept of inheriting the family line, and they eventually become "giant babies" who never grow up, which is the most persistent problem in Chinese marriages.
01
A pair of "siblings" are estranged because their parents were in a car accident, compelling the elder sister An Ran to face the choice between self-realization (attending graduate school in Beijing) and taking care of her 5-year-old brother. This is a realistic drama touching on the social problems of "male favoritism" and "second child", and also a "tear-jerking" emotional drama.
"Family love" is more than everything, no matter how sharp the "gender issue" is, it will return to the traditional emotional mode. However, how is the audience made to feel more "empathy"? That is, the elder sister who was insulted and deprived of childhood finally reconciled with herself and the past and chose "brotherly love".
Given the parents had left, the relationship between sister and brother could be restored because of responsibility and blood ties. The reason why Confucian ethics constructed by blood ties is so powerful is that it has been internalized into the ethical concept of the Chinese people. Although many people will complain and resist, in the end, they will unconsciously make choices. The so-called "conforming to fate" is living according to cultural customs.
02
In the film, An Ran's aunt was also an "elder sister". She was admitted to a famous university, while her brother was admitted to a technical secondary school. Their family could only afford to sponsor one child in school, so she gave up the chance to attend university for her brother. We can say that the family's resources were limited and skewed towards the male child, but when her younger brother had children, her mother asked her to give up her thriving career and go home to take care of her younger brother's children, which was a bit "over the line". It is clear that girls do not exist as independent individuals, but as "functional" members of the family. However, will the younger brothers protected by the family grow up to be accountable and responsible? They will only reproduce the same ideas in the next generation.
When An Ran was a girl, for her parents to give birth to a boy, she had to dress up as a disabled person. She was not only deprived of all the care, but her father altered her college entrance examination choice to make her take proper care of her younger brother. This kind of "utilitarian birth" and growth without love can only lead to bitterness and resentment. Parents raise boys not to love, but to carry on the family line. People are tools rather than ends, which is the toxin of this culture; and if women are unable to wake up and grow out of the shackles of this culture, they will also replicate this concept in the next generation.
Both An Ran's aunt and An Ran who swore to escape the fate of the previous generation, all fell into the trap of fate. Their lives had been arranged by the family, just living passively based on others' initiatives.
03
"Exalting blood ties" is no way out, because this kind of ethical relationship is set up according to the "father-son" rather than the "husband-wife" contractual relationship; therefore, there will be no real equality between "men and women". To break the shackles of blood ties and let "brotherly love" return to nature and equality, we need to break this kind of moral kidnapping and return to the source of love.
It is only to different degrees that An Ran is also influenced by these kind of cultural ethics. Therefore, I can understand the unfairness that An Ran, as a "sister", encounters. Parents do not educate boys to take more responsibility and protect women, but teach them to be taken care of by women in their families. How can such a man take care of his wife when he is married?
In the pursuit of commercial profits, movies often turn serious problems into sensational "tear gas".
But obviously, it is unrealistic to reflect on family ethics through films and television works. It is said that the original story of the film is even crueler. The elder sister sold her parents' house and abandoned her younger brother.
A few years ago, I read a very challenging passage in the Bible. It seemed as if He "neglected" his mother and brothers. It is He who extends the family relationship from blood relationship to a community of values, which is the way to achieve brotherhood without any family bond.
While Jesus was still talking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, wanting to speak to him. Someone told him, “Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you.”
He replied to him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.” (Matthew 12:46-50)
A relationship can be made stable only by transcending blood ties and building on truth and values. That explains why Western societies can achieve "universal love". They can adopt children from other countries and take care of orphans and sick children, rather than regard blood ties as the highest standard.
Without love and justice, it is just arranged, which can easily lead to resentment within the family and between people. Even if they are moved for a short time, it will be difficult to persist.
- Translated by Nonye Nancy
(This article was originally published in the "Manhua freedom" WeChat account; CCD reprinted with permission.)
Chinese Movie 'Sister': While Blood Ties Have Naturally Become 'Morally Right', Women Find Hard to Break Free from Arranged Life
