About 12 years ago, I had just graduated from high school in China and was about to go to the United States for college. Most people might find it hard to understand, but I was very reluctant to leave China at that time and even considered giving up studying in the United States. This was because my sister, who is 18 years younger than me, had just been born.
Growing up in a broken family, I had severely lacked parental companionship, which made me even more eager to nurture and accompany my half-sister as she grew up. Additionally, I was faced with leaving my closest relatives—my grandparents who had raised me since childhood. They were elderly but had not yet come to faith. As the only Christian in my family at the time, I was very worried that if I went to study in the United States, there would be no one to continue sharing the gospel with them, leading to eternal regret.
Thus, in August of the same year, with an extremely anxious and reluctant heart, I left home and embarked on my journey to study in the United States alone.
Today, 12 years later, I have achieved academic success in the United States. I had thought that I would finally be able to reunite with my family back in China, but things did not go as planned. My grandparents had passed away in the previous years, and my sister had also moved overseas with her parents. However, despite the deteriorating domestic situation and the fact that I had no relatives left in China, I still resolutely decided to return to China. Why is that?
The root cause lies in my faith. I deeply understand that the current domestic environment is quite unfavorable, leading many people to “run” to Western countries in pursuit of a better life. However, I believe that Christians should uphold a different value system from the secular world, prioritizing God’s kingdom over self-interest (Matthew 6:2–33).
Recently, many Christians around me have chosen to run abroad for various reasons. Some say, “I don’t want my children to grow up in an environment like China.” Others say, “There is a lack of good church life and freedom of speech in China, making life too oppressive.” And some say, “It’s hard to make money in China now.” Although these reasons seem valid, they share a common trait: they do not prioritize the needs of God’s kingdom. Often, such people are in the majority.
Regardless of the current situation and what we have to face, I believe that a Christian’s primary responsibility is their duty as a Christian and their responsibility in God’s kingdom. In other words, we should first examine whether our actions align with God’s will and values and whether they benefit God’s kingdom, rather than merely considering what benefits our earthly life. The cost of being a Christian is high, including spiritual responsibilities in God’s kingdom. As stated in Matthew 10:37–39: “Whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me… Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.”
In recent years, what has disappointed me the most is that many students from mainland China choose not to return after graduating from seminaries. Given the worsening situation in China, the expulsion of many missionaries, the dismantling of many churches, and the urgent need for more ministers to return to serve, I thought most of them would return to China. However, the reality is quite the opposite; at least 80% of seminary graduates from mainland China choose to stay in the United States.
Some are confused about their calling, so they want to find a job after graduation, believing it’s easier than starting over in China. They often say, “Let’s see how God leads and what opportunities open up.” Without delving into theological topics of God’s sovereignty and human free will, this attitude is actually a “go with the flow” mindset. As Christians, shouldn’t we strive to pursue?
Others have a clear goal: to stay in the United States by any means, under the pretext that “the United States also has needs.” Among them are those who came to study on church donations from China, having sworn to return before leaving, appearing to be mature, spiritual, and authoritative “pastors.” Why do I use quotes here? Because I believe such people are unworthy of the title; they are merely selfish, hypocritical, and cowardly, while pretending to be mentors. Do seminary graduates truly not know the needs in China, or do they think China doesn’t need them? Or are they pretending to be ignorant under lofty pretenses for selfish purposes?
When I saw the outbreak of the Israel-Hamas war, many Jews living in Western countries bought expensive tickets to return home to fight for their country. In the Russia-Ukraine war, a Ukrainian soldier guarding a bridge blew up the bridge at the cost of his own life to prevent Russian forces from crossing. If these people can make such great sacrifices for their earthly countries, then as Christians with eternal life and God’s promises, shouldn’t we be even more courageous and loyal for God’s kingdom? How can we call ourselves soldiers of the Lord?
In conclusion, many unbelievers run to the free world, which, from a spiritual perspective, I think is beneficial. Because in these places there is religious freedom, allowing those who run to have more opportunities to encounter the gospel. Most of the people who stay in China either cannot run or do not want to, which is the majority’s situation. Thus, domestic missionaries and pastors can serve these people more effectively. This way, people can be dispersed to be served by churches in the free world, while the few domestic pastors can serve those who need it most.
However, I hope to see more Christians stay in China to meet the needs, as the population is vast, the fields are broad, and the need is urgent.
Three months ago, I returned to China, and upon returning, I found the situation more urgent and desperate than I imagined. From a spiritual perspective, China is like a dried-up pond, and I hope more people will come to serve in China, as it urgently needs your help. I am waiting for your arrival here.
Rex Chen is an independent evangelist in Mainland China, who is a graduate from The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and The Master’s University. He is also a professional equity & forex trader.
Originally from Webpage "ChinaSource"
CCD edited and reprinted with permission
大概是12年前，那时的我在国内刚高中毕业，即将独自一人去美国上大学。说起来大多数人可能难以理解，当时的我十分不舍得离开中国，甚至一度想放弃去美国求学。因为在那时，与我相差18岁的妹妹刚刚降生。由于我从小原生家庭破碎，成长的过程中严重缺失父母亲的陪伴，这让我倍加希望能呵护和陪伴这位同母异父的妹妹的长大。同时，也面临着要离开我最亲密的亲人—— 从小带大我的外公外婆，他们年事已高，但都还没信主。作为当时家里唯一的基督徒，我非常担心去美国读书后无人继续给他们传福音，而导致永远的遗憾。就这样，同年的8月，我怀着无比忐忑和不舍的心情离开了家，独自一人踏上了前往美国求学之路。
12年后的今天，我已在美国学有所成。本以为此时终于能够回国与家人团聚，然而事与愿违。我的外公外婆已相继在前些年去世，我的妹妹也已经随着父母移居海外。然而，在国内大环境每况愈下，国内也已经没有任何亲人的情况下，我还是毅然决然地决定回国，这是为什么呢？
其根源在于我的信仰。我深刻理解当前国内的大环境相当不利，这导致许多人选择“润”去欧美国家追求更佳的生活。然而，我认为基督徒应该秉持与当下世俗价值体系不同的观念，即凡事应以神的国为优先考量，而非以自身为中心。（马太福音6:2–33）
近期，我周围的许多基督徒选择“润”出去，原因多种多样。但有的人和我说：“我不愿意让我的子 女在中国这样的环境中长大。有的人说，“国内缺乏良好的教会生活和言论自由，生活的太压抑。”还有的人说，“国内现在不好赚钱”。虽然这些理由都看似有道理。但它们都有一个共通之处，即未将神国的需要置于首位。而往往这样的人占大多数。
无论当下的情况和所要面对事情是什么，我认为基督徒的首要之责是自己作为基督徒和在神国里的责任。换言之，应当先审视自身的行为是否符合神的心意和价值观，并且是否对神的国有益处，而非仅仅考虑对自己的属世生活有什么益处。做基督徒的代价是大的，其中包括神国的属灵责任。正如马太福音10:37–39所说：“…爱儿女过于爱我的人不配做我的门徒… 试图保全自己生命的反而会失去生命，但为我舍弃生命的反而会得到生命。”
近年来，最让我失望的却是许多从中国大陆来神学院读书的同学。在国内形势日益恶化、大量宣教士被驱逐出境、许多教会被瓦解、亟需更多传道人回国服务的背景下，本以为大部分的他们都会回国，但现实恰恰相反。80%来自中国大陆的神学生毕业后选择留在美国。一些人对自己的呼召感到迷茫，所以毕业后想先找一份工作干着，他们认为这总比回国从头再来要相对容易。他们常挂在嘴边的是“看神带领/开路吧”。这里暂且不上升到神的主权和人的自由意志的神学话题，这种态度实际上是一种随遇而安（go with the flow）的心态，而作为基督徒，我们不应该是竭力追求吗？另外一些人则是目标很明确，就是想尽办法留在美国，美其名曰“美国也很需要”。其中不乏一些拿着国内教会奉献来读书，来前信誓旦旦承诺一定回国，并看起来年长、属灵、又有权威的“牧者”。为什么我在这要用引号？因为我觉得这种人根本不配这个尊称，其充其量就是个自私的，假冒为善的，并好为人师的懦夫。其实，神学院的大陆毕业生究竟是真的不知道国内的需要，还是觉得国内不需要？又或者，他们其实是打着一些冠冕的堂皇旗号，出于自私的目的在装傻呢？
当我看到以色列——哈马斯战争爆发时，许多居住在欧美地区的犹太人，为了自己的国家，购买高价机票回国参加战。以及俄乌战争中，一名守桥的乌克兰士兵由于来不及离开大桥，毅然炸毁了桥梁，以牺牲自己来阻止俄罗斯部队通过。如果这些人只是为了自己地上的国家，都能做出如此大的牺牲，那作为拥有永恒生命和神的承诺的基督徒，为了神的国，却远不及他们的勇气和忠诚，这让我们何以自处？我们是否配称为耶和华的精兵？
总的来说，许多尚未信主的国人“润”去自由世界，从属灵的角度上考虑，我认为是有益的。因为 这些地方有宗教的自由，这使得“润”出去的人有更多机会接触福音。而留在国内的人很多是“润”不出去，或不想“润”的人，这是绝大多数国民的处境。那么国内的宣教士和牧者就能够更有效、有针对性地服侍这些没有其他选择的人群。所以，这样既能让国内的人分流出去让自由世界的教会服侍，又能让国内的紧缺的牧者更高效地服侍到应该被服侍的人群。但我更希望看到更多的基督徒留在国内，以满足国内的需求，因为这个人口基数是庞大的，禾场是广阔的，需求也是急迫的。
三个月前我回到国内，回国后发现实际情况比我想象中的更为迫切和需要。从属灵的层面来看，中国犹如一片干涸的水塘，因此我希望能有更多的人来到中国服侍，中国迫切需要你们的帮助，我也在此等候着你们的到来。
原文载于《华源协作》
CCD授权转发
回到中国：一位神学生的归乡之旅
About 12 years ago, I had just graduated from high school in China and was about to go to the United States for college. Most people might find it hard to understand, but I was very reluctant to leave China at that time and even considered giving up studying in the United States. This was because my sister, who is 18 years younger than me, had just been born.
Growing up in a broken family, I had severely lacked parental companionship, which made me even more eager to nurture and accompany my half-sister as she grew up. Additionally, I was faced with leaving my closest relatives—my grandparents who had raised me since childhood. They were elderly but had not yet come to faith. As the only Christian in my family at the time, I was very worried that if I went to study in the United States, there would be no one to continue sharing the gospel with them, leading to eternal regret.
Thus, in August of the same year, with an extremely anxious and reluctant heart, I left home and embarked on my journey to study in the United States alone.
Today, 12 years later, I have achieved academic success in the United States. I had thought that I would finally be able to reunite with my family back in China, but things did not go as planned. My grandparents had passed away in the previous years, and my sister had also moved overseas with her parents. However, despite the deteriorating domestic situation and the fact that I had no relatives left in China, I still resolutely decided to return to China. Why is that?
The root cause lies in my faith. I deeply understand that the current domestic environment is quite unfavorable, leading many people to “run” to Western countries in pursuit of a better life. However, I believe that Christians should uphold a different value system from the secular world, prioritizing God’s kingdom over self-interest (Matthew 6:2–33).
Recently, many Christians around me have chosen to run abroad for various reasons. Some say, “I don’t want my children to grow up in an environment like China.” Others say, “There is a lack of good church life and freedom of speech in China, making life too oppressive.” And some say, “It’s hard to make money in China now.” Although these reasons seem valid, they share a common trait: they do not prioritize the needs of God’s kingdom. Often, such people are in the majority.
Regardless of the current situation and what we have to face, I believe that a Christian’s primary responsibility is their duty as a Christian and their responsibility in God’s kingdom. In other words, we should first examine whether our actions align with God’s will and values and whether they benefit God’s kingdom, rather than merely considering what benefits our earthly life. The cost of being a Christian is high, including spiritual responsibilities in God’s kingdom. As stated in Matthew 10:37–39: “Whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me… Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.”
In recent years, what has disappointed me the most is that many students from mainland China choose not to return after graduating from seminaries. Given the worsening situation in China, the expulsion of many missionaries, the dismantling of many churches, and the urgent need for more ministers to return to serve, I thought most of them would return to China. However, the reality is quite the opposite; at least 80% of seminary graduates from mainland China choose to stay in the United States.
Some are confused about their calling, so they want to find a job after graduation, believing it’s easier than starting over in China. They often say, “Let’s see how God leads and what opportunities open up.” Without delving into theological topics of God’s sovereignty and human free will, this attitude is actually a “go with the flow” mindset. As Christians, shouldn’t we strive to pursue?
Others have a clear goal: to stay in the United States by any means, under the pretext that “the United States also has needs.” Among them are those who came to study on church donations from China, having sworn to return before leaving, appearing to be mature, spiritual, and authoritative “pastors.” Why do I use quotes here? Because I believe such people are unworthy of the title; they are merely selfish, hypocritical, and cowardly, while pretending to be mentors. Do seminary graduates truly not know the needs in China, or do they think China doesn’t need them? Or are they pretending to be ignorant under lofty pretenses for selfish purposes?
When I saw the outbreak of the Israel-Hamas war, many Jews living in Western countries bought expensive tickets to return home to fight for their country. In the Russia-Ukraine war, a Ukrainian soldier guarding a bridge blew up the bridge at the cost of his own life to prevent Russian forces from crossing. If these people can make such great sacrifices for their earthly countries, then as Christians with eternal life and God’s promises, shouldn’t we be even more courageous and loyal for God’s kingdom? How can we call ourselves soldiers of the Lord?
In conclusion, many unbelievers run to the free world, which, from a spiritual perspective, I think is beneficial. Because in these places there is religious freedom, allowing those who run to have more opportunities to encounter the gospel. Most of the people who stay in China either cannot run or do not want to, which is the majority’s situation. Thus, domestic missionaries and pastors can serve these people more effectively. This way, people can be dispersed to be served by churches in the free world, while the few domestic pastors can serve those who need it most.
However, I hope to see more Christians stay in China to meet the needs, as the population is vast, the fields are broad, and the need is urgent.
Three months ago, I returned to China, and upon returning, I found the situation more urgent and desperate than I imagined. From a spiritual perspective, China is like a dried-up pond, and I hope more people will come to serve in China, as it urgently needs your help. I am waiting for your arrival here.
Rex Chen is an independent evangelist in Mainland China, who is a graduate from The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and The Master’s University. He is also a professional equity & forex trader.
Originally from Webpage "ChinaSource"
CCD edited and reprinted with permission
Homeward Bound: A Christian’s Return to China
