There goes a Chinese saying that good companions have a good influence while bad ones have a bad influence. We will take on the good attributes of our associates, but we may fall into a pit in the company of bad friends. There is an ancient story of Mencius’ mother who moved her home three times to better her son’s education.
Christians should have the wisdom of making friends who can help us grow.
Then what is a true friend? How can we be wise in making friends? The answer has been written in the Bible.
Let’s take a look at how these verses tell us.
There are five categories of persons considered as bad companions:
Proverbs 13:20 Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.
Proverbs 24:21-22 Fear the Lord and the king, my son,
and do not join with rebellious officials.
for those two will send sudden destruction on them,
and who knows what calamities they can bring?
Proverbs 22:24-25 Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person,
do not associate with one easily angered,
or you may learn their ways
and get yourself ensnared.
Proverbs 20:19 A gossip betrays a confidence;
so avoid anyone who talks too much.
Proverbs 23:20-21 Do not join those who drink too much wine
or gorge themselves on meat,
for drunkards and gluttons become poor,
and drowsiness clothes them in rags.
Below are descriptions of five types of friends we should make:
Proverbs 27:5-6 Better is open rebuke
than hidden love.
Wounds from a friend can be trusted,
but an enemy multiplies kisses.
Proverbs 27:10 Do not forsake your friend or a friend of your family, and do not go to your relative’s house when disaster strikes you — better a neighbor nearby than a relative far away.
Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times,
and a brother is born for a time of adversity.
Proverbs 19:22 What a person desires is unfailing love;
better to be poor than a liar.
Proverbs 28:7 A discerning son heeds instruction,
but a companion of gluttons disgraces his father.
- Translated by Karen Luo
中国有句俗语：近朱者赤近墨者黑。跟好的朋友在一起，我们自己也会变得越来越好；而误交损友时，很可能会把我们给带到沟里去。因此才有了古代孟母三迁的故事，孟母不断地搬地方，也是为了给下一代营造一个良好的成长环境。
基督徒也需要有交友的智慧，要交真心实意的朋友，能够让我们互帮互助、一起成长的朋友。
那么，怎样的朋友才是真心实意的朋友？我们要如何地去智慧交友呢？圣经里面已经给了我们答案。来看看这些经文怎么说的吧！
不可结交的五类人：
1，你与智慧人同行，你就得到智慧；和愚昧人作伴，必受亏损。（箴13:20）
与智慧的人生活、相处，我们能从他那里学习到智慧；和勤劳的人相处，我们也会变得勤劳。因此，需要学会分辨，与智慧的人交友。
2，我儿，你要敬畏耶和华与君王，不要与反复无常的人结交，因为他们的灾难，必忽然而起。耶和华与君王所施行的毁灭，谁能知道呢？（箴24:21）
外界环境对人的影响是大的，我们与怎样的人为伍，久而久之也会变成怎样的人。交友需要慎重，不要反复无常的人交往，这样的人变化不定，没有立场。
3，好生气的人，不可与他结交；暴怒的人，不可与他来往，恐怕你效法他的行为，自己就陷在网罗里。（箴22:24-25）
冲动是魔鬼，脾气暴躁的人往往是因为情绪不稳定，不能很好地控制自己的情绪，所以急起来就横眉瞪目。和这样的人为伍，很容易被卷入到是非之中。
4，往来传舌的，泄漏密事；大张嘴的，不可与他结交。（箴20:19）
往来传舌就是搬弄是非，到处东家长西家短的，说着别人的闲话，不能管理好自己的口舌，拿别人的隐私当玩笑，这样的人不能与之结交。
5，好饮酒的，好吃肉的，不要与他们来往。因为好酒贪食的，必至贫穷，好睡觉的，必穿破烂衣服。（箴23:20-21）
好酒贪杯的人是贫穷的人，不一定是物质上的贫穷，也有可能是心灵上的贫穷。醉酒会使人失去理智，醉酒容易误事，这一类人不要与他们来往。
应结交的五类朋友：
1，当面的责备，强如背地的爱情。朋友加的伤痕出于忠诚；仇敌连连亲嘴，却是多余。（箴27:5-6）
真正的朋友，在看到你的不足之处时，会带着爱的善意直接指出来，而不是在背后说三道四。虽然朋友的劝告听起来虽然刺耳，却好过敌人的恭维话。
2，你的朋友，和父亲的朋友，你都不可离弃。你遭难的日子，不要上弟兄的家去；相近的邻舍，强如远方的弟兄。（箴27:10）
要很好地爱自己的邻舍，中国有句俗话：远亲不如近邻。很多时候我们急需要帮助时，很有可能就是邻居能够帮到我们。
3，朋友乃时常亲爱，弟兄为患难而生。（箴17:17）
在主内彼此要成为朋友一样，时常彼此关心，也要相互担当彼此的难处与重担。而不是对他人的困难视而不见。
4，施行仁慈的，令人爱慕；穷人强如说谎言的。（箴19:22）
一个穷人真心诚意地去帮助别人时，他已经远远胜过那些虽然有钱、却满嘴谎言、对他人的寻求视若无睹的富人。要与施行仁慈的人成为朋友。
5，谨守律法的是智慧之子；与贪食人作伴的，却羞辱其父。（箴28:7）
真正智慧的人，是要与遵行神的律法、谨守神诫命的人成为朋友。敬畏和顺服神的人，在日常生活当中，也会遵照神的律法去行。
从圣经学习 基督徒当交和不可交的朋友
There goes a Chinese saying that good companions have a good influence while bad ones have a bad influence. We will take on the good attributes of our associates, but we may fall into a pit in the company of bad friends. There is an ancient story of Mencius’ mother who moved her home three times to better her son’s education.
Christians should have the wisdom of making friends who can help us grow.
Then what is a true friend? How can we be wise in making friends? The answer has been written in the Bible.
Let’s take a look at how these verses tell us.
There are five categories of persons considered as bad companions:
Proverbs 13:20 Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.
Proverbs 24:21-22 Fear the Lord and the king, my son,
and do not join with rebellious officials.
for those two will send sudden destruction on them,
and who knows what calamities they can bring?
Proverbs 22:24-25 Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person,
do not associate with one easily angered,
or you may learn their ways
and get yourself ensnared.
Proverbs 20:19 A gossip betrays a confidence;
so avoid anyone who talks too much.
Proverbs 23:20-21 Do not join those who drink too much wine
or gorge themselves on meat,
for drunkards and gluttons become poor,
and drowsiness clothes them in rags.
Below are descriptions of five types of friends we should make:
Proverbs 27:5-6 Better is open rebuke
than hidden love.
Wounds from a friend can be trusted,
but an enemy multiplies kisses.
Proverbs 27:10 Do not forsake your friend or a friend of your family, and do not go to your relative’s house when disaster strikes you — better a neighbor nearby than a relative far away.
Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times,
and a brother is born for a time of adversity.
Proverbs 19:22 What a person desires is unfailing love;
better to be poor than a liar.
Proverbs 28:7 A discerning son heeds instruction,
but a companion of gluttons disgraces his father.
- Translated by Karen Luo
The Bible Urges Us to Make Good Friends, Avoid Bad Ones
