A post-70s scholar shares on the topic of "my reflections and insights as a church minister and as a mother."
Sister Yin Wanrong (pseudonym) is a scholar born in the 1970s, who has a son who is 25 years old and a daughter who is 20. Over the course of her 17 years as a Christian, she has served in the church while raising her children.
The following is an excerpt from a recent interview with Ms. Yin by the Christian Times, an online Christian newspaper in China:
Christian Times: How do you perceive the significance and value of women’s service in the church, especially that of the wives of pastors?
Yin Wanrong: Women have played a significant role in establishing and developing churches throughout history, especially before Christianity became the state religion of Rome. Furthermore, women are indispensable in all areas of ministry within the church. Therefore, the church must acknowledge the significance of their participation.
I feel enormously blessed to be serving in the church myself. The book Good to Great suggests that individuals find joy when their passions, abilities, and benefits align, allowing them to transition from being “good” to “great”.
However, women and pastors’ wives who serve in the church often carry heavy burdens and have to experience their happiness amidst them.
First, women often possess multiple roles, which adds to their workload. Additionally, Satan tends to target women's vulnerabilities, disrupting and destabilizing their responsibilities. Thirdly, a lack of understanding and support from family members or colleagues can also contribute to their burden. Finally, the longer they serve, the more complex women's problems become since they begin considering the position of women in the church and how to collaborate with their co-workers.
Based on my observations, the primary challenge for women serving in Chinese churches is their inadequate theological knowledge and education. They require extensive training.
Christian Times: As a mother, what values do you uphold and what methods do you use to raise your children?
Yin Wanrong: A mother is like the soil and the root of a tree, as she is the nurturer and the provider. So, mothers should talk less, let go less, and nag less. Although it is difficult, children must experience life on their own so that they will grow.
However, Christian mothers may face more challenges raising their children than other non-Christians:
The first challenge is the devil’s attack on how women dress in the church to disrupt their service.
Secondly, it is challenging to teach your own children well. Sometimes you have to teach the children of other parents and let them teach yours. However, no matter how well you preach or how well you serve, more often than not, your own children observe you—their mother—from the way you actually live and how you interact with them.
Thirdly, as servants of the Lord, we hope to have our children raised in the Lord since they are young so that they will have a good foundation in their faith.
Finally, children of pastoral staff may easily cover themselves under a mask due to congregation and maternal expectations. They may seem well-behaved in front of others, but it may be quite a different story behind their backs.
Christian Times: What are your thoughts on parenting? Have you had any reflections or growth?
Yin Wanrong: In some way, it is not me raising my children, but my children teaching me. I aspire to grow with my children together and become their intercessor.
As your child grows older, the amount of time spent with them as parents becomes less important. What truly matters is that your child is willing to come home and communicate with you. Too much companionship may indicate a parent's unwillingness to let go and intervene too much, which could limit the child's growth and development.
To foster healthy communication with my children, I read the Bible and pray with them daily, especially when they were young, to help establish good habits. Additionally, I deliberately organize weekly family gatherings where we pray for each other, sing together, share our thoughts and support one another. I also encourage my children to keep a devotional journal and diary. Lastly, I guide them in prayer when they face challenges and support them until they overcome these obstacles.
When teaching your child, you need to completely depend on God in every step and maintain humble before Him. Without due care, parents might overstep boundaries or fail to establish an appropriate limit for their children. The boundary should provide children with enough space to gain confidence, develop independence, and be accountable while remaining disciplined under parental direction.
- Translated by Joyce Leung
一位70后学者，分享了“作为教会事奉者和母亲的反思与感悟”这个话题。
尹婉蓉（化名）姊妹是一位70后学者，她育有一儿（25岁）一女（20岁）。在信主17年的过程中，她经历了事奉教会和养育孩子的历程。
近日，尹老师接受了中国一网络基督教报纸基督时报的采访，以下是分享的核心摘要。
基督时报：您如何看待女性，尤其是师母，她们在教会里事奉的意义和价值？
尹婉蓉：从教会历史上，尤其是在基督教成为罗马的国教以前，对于教会的建立和发展，女性都是功不可没的。第二点，姊妹在教会里面，她们在各样的服事上面都是不可或缺的。教会应该需要肯定姐妹、师母在教会里侍奉的价值。
对我自己来说 ，我作为一个教会的服事者，我自己是感觉到很幸福。《从优秀到卓越》这本书里面，说当一个人热爱，能力和由此而来的收益三者重合的时候，那么他会感到很幸福，从一个优秀者甚至提升到一个卓越的地步。
对于教会里事奉的姐妹和师母群体而言，她们的幸福感往往是在负重前行中去体会的。
第一，女性本来就扮演了多重的角色，要做很多的工作。第二个，撒旦也会利用女性的一些弱点，有很多攻击搅扰的破坏工作。第三个是，在这个过程当中还有一层负重是来自于家人的不理解、不支持，或者是同工不能够很好的肯定、接纳和鼓励。第四个就是，女性自身有的一种困惑，因服事的时间越长，越会思考女性究竟在教会当中怎样被定位，怎样来和同工配搭的问题。
目前我看到中国教会的姊妹在服事当中，比较大的局限是其人文素养和神学装备方面是明显需要被培训的。
基督时报：作为母亲，您是带着怎样的价值观、方式与方法来养育你的孩子？
尹婉蓉：妈妈的角色就是土壤，是树木之根。也就是说母亲是养育者、供给者。母亲要少说话，多放手，少唠叨。让孩子自己去试炼，去经历成长，这个是很难但很必要的功课。
但信主的姊妹在养育孩子上面，有时可能比世上的人还要艰难。有以下几点:
第一个，这个艰难来自于姊妹在教会服饰那种属灵的攻击。魔鬼想用这个来拖垮姊妹的服事。
第二个，自己的孩子很难教好。有时要教别人家的孩子，然后让别人来教自家的孩子。自家的孩子不管你讲道讲得多么好，不管你服事的多么好，他们更多地从切实的生活和关系当中来看自己的母亲。
第三个，作为服侍者，我们希望孩子从小就在主里面被养育，让他的信仰有很好的根基。
第四个，作为服侍者家里的孩子很容易变得假冒。因着教会和母亲对他们的期待，他们有的时候会表现出来很好，但实际上背地里会就是就是另外是一套。
基督时报：您如何看待自己的养育观和在养育孩子中反思与成长？
尹婉蓉：不是我在养孩子，是从另一个角度来说是孩子在培养我。我要和孩子一同来成长，还要成为孩子的代祷者。
随着他年龄的增长，父母的陪伴时间的多少不是最紧要的。紧要的是孩子愿意跟你谈，愿意回家，愿意和你保持一个可以沟通的交流的关系。过度的陪伴是不肯放手和过度干预的一种模式，会带给孩子很多的挟制和不必要的伤害。
我对孩子的引导，第一个就是尤其是在孩子比较小的时候，带着他们每天读经祷告，养成一个习惯。第二个，我有意识地建立每周的家庭会议，在一起彼此代祷告、唱歌，分享最近的心情，或者是对彼此说鼓励和赞美的话等等。第三个就是鼓励他们写灵修笔记、写日记。还有一个就是当遇到一些事情的时候，带着他们祷告，带领他们走困境之中走出来。
管教孩子的尺度是，每一步都需要紧紧依靠神，谦卑在神面前的事情。父母稍不注意就可能过界了，也有可能没有给孩子立好界限。这个界限就是父母在管教当中，在不让他们失了志气的前提下，让他们有信心去面对自己的人生，勇敢地承担起自己的责任。
2023母亲节专访(四)｜一西南基督徒学者分享：我在事奉教会和养育孩子的道路上的看见与思考
A post-70s scholar shares on the topic of "my reflections and insights as a church minister and as a mother."
Sister Yin Wanrong (pseudonym) is a scholar born in the 1970s, who has a son who is 25 years old and a daughter who is 20. Over the course of her 17 years as a Christian, she has served in the church while raising her children.
The following is an excerpt from a recent interview with Ms. Yin by the Christian Times, an online Christian newspaper in China:
Christian Times: How do you perceive the significance and value of women’s service in the church, especially that of the wives of pastors?
Yin Wanrong: Women have played a significant role in establishing and developing churches throughout history, especially before Christianity became the state religion of Rome. Furthermore, women are indispensable in all areas of ministry within the church. Therefore, the church must acknowledge the significance of their participation.
I feel enormously blessed to be serving in the church myself. The book Good to Great suggests that individuals find joy when their passions, abilities, and benefits align, allowing them to transition from being “good” to “great”.
However, women and pastors’ wives who serve in the church often carry heavy burdens and have to experience their happiness amidst them.
First, women often possess multiple roles, which adds to their workload. Additionally, Satan tends to target women's vulnerabilities, disrupting and destabilizing their responsibilities. Thirdly, a lack of understanding and support from family members or colleagues can also contribute to their burden. Finally, the longer they serve, the more complex women's problems become since they begin considering the position of women in the church and how to collaborate with their co-workers.
Based on my observations, the primary challenge for women serving in Chinese churches is their inadequate theological knowledge and education. They require extensive training.
Christian Times: As a mother, what values do you uphold and what methods do you use to raise your children?
Yin Wanrong: A mother is like the soil and the root of a tree, as she is the nurturer and the provider. So, mothers should talk less, let go less, and nag less. Although it is difficult, children must experience life on their own so that they will grow.
However, Christian mothers may face more challenges raising their children than other non-Christians:
The first challenge is the devil’s attack on how women dress in the church to disrupt their service.
Secondly, it is challenging to teach your own children well. Sometimes you have to teach the children of other parents and let them teach yours. However, no matter how well you preach or how well you serve, more often than not, your own children observe you—their mother—from the way you actually live and how you interact with them.
Thirdly, as servants of the Lord, we hope to have our children raised in the Lord since they are young so that they will have a good foundation in their faith.
Finally, children of pastoral staff may easily cover themselves under a mask due to congregation and maternal expectations. They may seem well-behaved in front of others, but it may be quite a different story behind their backs.
Christian Times: What are your thoughts on parenting? Have you had any reflections or growth?
Yin Wanrong: In some way, it is not me raising my children, but my children teaching me. I aspire to grow with my children together and become their intercessor.
As your child grows older, the amount of time spent with them as parents becomes less important. What truly matters is that your child is willing to come home and communicate with you. Too much companionship may indicate a parent's unwillingness to let go and intervene too much, which could limit the child's growth and development.
To foster healthy communication with my children, I read the Bible and pray with them daily, especially when they were young, to help establish good habits. Additionally, I deliberately organize weekly family gatherings where we pray for each other, sing together, share our thoughts and support one another. I also encourage my children to keep a devotional journal and diary. Lastly, I guide them in prayer when they face challenges and support them until they overcome these obstacles.
When teaching your child, you need to completely depend on God in every step and maintain humble before Him. Without due care, parents might overstep boundaries or fail to establish an appropriate limit for their children. The boundary should provide children with enough space to gain confidence, develop independence, and be accountable while remaining disciplined under parental direction.
- Translated by Joyce Leung
Mother's Day Interview: Christian Scholar Relies on God to Raise Children
