The wife of a pastor encouraged single Christians to get involved in the fellowship, as they are likely to be withdrawn if they are single for a long time, especially those that are older.
Under the epidemic, although online gatherings are accessible and people can also talk with each other virtually, their hearts are closed to a certain extent with less social interaction.
Recently, a pastor’s wife called S for short in south China talked about an older single female believer who came to a new city but could not communicate with other believers as the church was closed due to COVID-19. She was alone with her mother, raising a puppy because of loneliness. With the encouragement of S, she began to communicate with the neighbors around her, getting joy and vitality.
Asked about her marriage, she said that she hadn’t planned to get married and that she had not ever fallen in love with others. S worried, "Older single female believers, even if high-level intellectuals, may become more and more unsociable since they have no company without protection from the church if they are not committed to a church."
S said that it seemed that there were more outstanding female Christians than male ones in churches, but she believed God might prepare the other halves for them.
But on the other hand, S also reminded the female believers not to overestimate themselves. Some single female ones, 30 or 40 years old, had the requirements for mate selection the same as at the age of 17 or 18, hoping to meet someone they loved at first sight. S believed that love, at first sight, was rare and could not last long. Many people said that they have no feelings for others, but the feelings were also unreliable as they might change.
At present, influenced by some secular values, female Christians may see if the other party has a house or a car when choosing their life partners. S stated that if a male believer had a good character, a sense of responsibility, skills, and the ability to support a family, he was an option, no matter whether he had a house.
- Translated by Abigail Wu
大龄的单身青年，无论是弟兄还是姐妹，单身时间久了，性格比较容易走向孤僻。一位师母鼓励单身弟兄姐妹要更多融入到团契之中。
疫情下，网络聚会虽然更为便利，但与真实的团契活动相比，人的社交活动大大减少。即便网络上也可以与弟兄姐妹交流，交通，但是人的心还是或多或少有点封闭。
最近一位南方教会的师母讲到一个姊妹大龄单身，来到一个新的城市，因为教堂不能开门，不能跟其他信徒交流。生活中只有母亲一个熟悉的人，因为孤单自己养了一个小狗。在这位师母的鼓励下，她开始与周围邻舍有了交往，脸上才慢慢有了笑容和生气。
这位师母问到姐妹的婚姻，姐妹说对婚姻没有计划，觉得没有心动的，自己也没有谈过男朋友。师母担忧：“大龄姐妹，没有进入婚姻，没有陪伴，又不能在教会里面得到保护，即便是个高级知识分子，性格也可能越来越孤僻。”
谈到大龄姐妹的婚姻问题，这位师母认为一方面现在社会上姐妹的学历普遍高于弟兄，看起来教会里优秀的姐妹更多。这的确也是一个难题，但是相信上帝那里都有预备。
但另一方面，师母也提醒姐妹不要对自己评估过高。她认为许多单身姐妹，虽然年龄已经超过30、40岁，但是择偶的要求还停留在17、8岁的眼光，希望遇到一见倾心的人。师母认为一见钟情毕竟是少数，而且未必长久。很多人说没有感觉，但是感觉也会变，感觉也是靠不住的。
现时有些姐妹也会受一些世俗价值观的影响，看对方是否有房子等。师母认为，对方没有房子不要紧，如果对方是真爱主，品格好，有责任心，并且有一技之长，有养家的能力，那么也是可以选择的。
https://christiantimes.cn/news/37822/%E5%AF%B9%E8%AF%9D%7C%20%E4%B8%80%E5%B8%88%E6%AF%8D%E9%BC%93%E5%8A%B1%E5%8D%95%E8%BA%AB%E5%BC%9F%E5%85%84%E5%A7%90%E5%A6%B9%EF%BC%9A%E6%8B%92%E7%BB%9D%E5%AD%A4%E5%83%BB%EF%BC%8C%E8%9E%8D%E5%85%A5%E5%9B%A2%E5%A5%91
对话| 一师母鼓励单身弟兄姐妹：拒绝孤僻，融入团契
The wife of a pastor encouraged single Christians to get involved in the fellowship, as they are likely to be withdrawn if they are single for a long time, especially those that are older.
Under the epidemic, although online gatherings are accessible and people can also talk with each other virtually, their hearts are closed to a certain extent with less social interaction.
Recently, a pastor’s wife called S for short in south China talked about an older single female believer who came to a new city but could not communicate with other believers as the church was closed due to COVID-19. She was alone with her mother, raising a puppy because of loneliness. With the encouragement of S, she began to communicate with the neighbors around her, getting joy and vitality.
Asked about her marriage, she said that she hadn’t planned to get married and that she had not ever fallen in love with others. S worried, "Older single female believers, even if high-level intellectuals, may become more and more unsociable since they have no company without protection from the church if they are not committed to a church."
S said that it seemed that there were more outstanding female Christians than male ones in churches, but she believed God might prepare the other halves for them.
But on the other hand, S also reminded the female believers not to overestimate themselves. Some single female ones, 30 or 40 years old, had the requirements for mate selection the same as at the age of 17 or 18, hoping to meet someone they loved at first sight. S believed that love, at first sight, was rare and could not last long. Many people said that they have no feelings for others, but the feelings were also unreliable as they might change.
At present, influenced by some secular values, female Christians may see if the other party has a house or a car when choosing their life partners. S stated that if a male believer had a good character, a sense of responsibility, skills, and the ability to support a family, he was an option, no matter whether he had a house.
- Translated by Abigail Wu
Dialogue: Pastor’s Wife Encourages Singles to Join Fellowship to Avoid Isolation
