The deaf community is a vulnerable group in society, and the deaf Christians are now marginalized in the church. Many people find it difficult to communicate with them because of hearing limitations and language barriers. At present, some churches have deaf fellowships and full-time ministry staff to serve them.
Sister Dai (hereinafter referred to as Dai) is now serving in a church in Jingmen, Hubei province. She came to Jingmen in 2018 and half a year later, she started serving the deaf fellowship. As now a full-time volunteer, Dai shared with the Gospel Times, an online Chinese Christian newspaper, some of her personal insights and gains from serving the community, hoping to help those who want to get involved in serving deaf people.
Gospel Times: What things should we know about serving the deaf group?
Dai: The first thing is respect. Each of them is sensitive and vulnerable. They are a vulnerable social group who will encounter some problems in their life and work, including falling in love with someone, which will lead to their sensitive mind, so we should respect them first. Because their living habits and ways of expression are very different from ours, we must get to know them and respect their habits and acknowledge them for who they are.
The second thing is listening. Of course, listening does not mean that we really listen to their voice. It means that we need to care for them, comfort them, and provide specific help for help. As a volunteer of the Union of Volunteers, I find that sometimes our help may not be recognized by them. Why is that? For example, if someone has high self-esteem, they may not want your help.
So listening is understanding their real needs and helping them to the extent that they will accept. A hasty offer of help or the help from the perspective of what we think is good for them would not necessarily lead to good results. It could easily backfire. This can also cause secondary damage to their heart: “Is he/she despising me?”
Another thing is inclusion. During the contact with them, we may find that the word order of their speech is reversed, and their expressions is quite different from ours. For example, have rice, they might say “rice, have”; Go there and play, they may say “play, go there”. In addition, they may show some exaggerated body movements in their expression, which should also be tolerated, because they may sometimes give you different information than you think. So you should use the word order and body language that they can understand. Be part of their group, and regard yourself as one of them, so as to fit in.
Accept the “bad” habits in their lives. For example, if someone is late for dinner, they won’t want to save the meal for that brother or sister. But if you make it clear to them, they will understand and agree to do it. Many of them have not been to school, and may seldom feel the warmth in the family. That would make them lack the common sense of life. These are very small things. We point these things out in the hope that they can realize that we are a group and a family so that they can learn to care about the people around them unconsciously.
Gospel Times: What mindset should the ministry worker have toward them?
Dai: The Bible says, “And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love”.(Corinthians 13:13) So I personally think the first thing is love. The Bible also teaches us to love each other and love others as ourselves.
They often need help in their life and work. From trivial family conflicts to emergencies of life and death, they would contact me immediately. Because once they trust you and establish a relationship with you, they treat you like family. Then they would share and tell you everything. So it’s important to serve with love.
The second thing is patience. The person serving them also needs to be patient. I recently had two sisters from my church who wanted to serve with me in the deaf fellowship. One of the sisters was involved once, but she got cold feet. She was frustrated because she could not communicate with them (she did not acquire sign language). When she arrived early, she had to write her greetings on paper, but many of them could not read and could not communicate directly.
To serve the special group requires enough patience. On the one hand, you should be patient with yourself. You should enter this group, blend into this group, and understand their living habits, language, and so on. You should also be patient with this group and sometimes maybe you need to treat them like your children.
Finally, confidence. From my personal involvement in ministry, it takes faith from God to go from not knowing the people, to loving them and being willing to serve them better.
Gospel Times: What do you personally think the church should do to help this community, or what the community needs most right now?
Dai: Care in daily life and spiritual growth. They are the forgotten people in society. In fact, many of them are psychologically inferior and helpless. Through contact with them, we know that many of them are bearing the burden of life and spiritual pressure. Therefore, they should be given continuous support and help in their life care. Our church pays great attention to helping the disabled. Every festival, the pastor will give some gifts to them with his fellow workers to show sympathy and care.
We should also pay attention to their spiritual growth, which is arguably more important. The care and help in life can help us to establish a deep and intimate relationship with them and become friends who they can talk about everything with, but I find it difficult to help them grow spiritually. This has been a big problem that I can’t deal with. (Editor’s note: Dai wants to go to seminary on her own and get a sign Language Bible kit.) I'm trying to do things like, you know, transcribe the Bible to learn words, and establish sign language classes.
Gospel Times: What have you learned from your personal service?
Dai: First, I have become soft and loving inside myself. I had never expected such a change. Before I started doing this, I was a cold and selfish person, a proud person with a hard heart, but through serving them, I was moved to tears. I started to understand love and care, and I’m serving willingly.
Second, I have fulfilled many of my dreams by serving God. I did not expect this, since my childhood dream to be a translator, or to be a teacher. But my current service is exactly these things! It is wonderful that God can fulfill my dream in this way. I cherish my current position.
Finally, trust in God and have faith. I did many things that I was afraid to do in this position, because we have to do these things to lead and serve them, and we must help them when they need it. So over and over again God gave me the power of faith.
Therefore, serving is also a position to be served. It seems that the servers are giving, that is, we have done something for them, but in fact, God has really served us, healed us, and changed us through these positions.
Afterword: Dai mentioned above that those who serve should be loving and faithful, and she herself always keeps serving with love in two aspects. First, give timely help in life. Dai will come to them as soon as possible when they are in need. If someone is ill and hospitalized, she sets a standard for herself when she pays a visit to them. The standard is donating no less than 200 yuan for each visit. Second, these believers’ homes are relatively far away from the church, so they cannot guarantee to come every week. Dai made an agreement with them that on the first Sunday of every month, everyone would be invited to worship, no matter what happens. After the worship, she would invite them to have dinner together, and then form a small fellowship to communicate with them again with the essence of the words shared by the pastor and let the truth enter deeper into their hearts.
- Translated by Nicolas Cao
聋人群体是社会中的弱势群体，而聋人弟兄姊妹在教会也属于边缘人士。因为听力受限，语言又不通，很多人很难与他们有交通。目前有些教会是有聋人团契，并有专职服侍人员参与服侍牧养。
戴姊妹目前在湖北荆门一所教会服侍，她于18年来到荆门，半年左右的时间就参与了聋人团契的服侍，目前是专职义工体。她和福音时报分享了在服侍这个群体中一些个人感悟和看见，以及收获，希望给想要参与聋人服侍的人一点帮助。（以下简称“戴”）
福音时报：服侍聋人群体需要注意些什么？
戴：首先是尊重。他们每个人都很敏感，内心脆弱。社会群体中他们是弱势群体，在他们的生活工作包括在谈恋爱当中都会遇到一些问题，种种情况下导致他们的心思敏感，所以首先要尊重他们。因为我们与他们的生活习惯，表达方式有太多的不一样。所以要了解他们并对他们的习惯方式给予尊重，对他们人本身给予认可。
其次是“倾听”。当然这个倾听不是我们真的去听他们说，意思是我们要去关怀、慰问他们，具体需要哪些帮助。我本身是义工联的志愿者，在做志愿者中发现，有时候我们帮助他们未必会得到他们的认可。为什么呢？比方说有的人自尊心很强，他未必需要你的帮助。
所以“倾听”就是了解到他们真实的需要，在他们可以被接受的范围内给予帮助。贸然的帮助，或站在我们自以为为他人好的角度给予帮助，其结果不一定是好的，很容易适得其反。而这也会给他们的心灵造成二次伤害：“你是不是看不起我”。
还有一个就是包容。和他们的接触中发现他们说话的语序是颠倒的，和我们的表达不一样。比如说吃饭，他们可能会说成“饭，吃”；到那边去玩，可能是“玩，到”。还有在表达中，他们会表露出一些夸张的肢体动作，这个也要包容，因为他可能有时候给到你的信息和你认为的不一样。但是你要用他们所能理解的语序，肢体语言去沟通交流。成为和他们一样的群体，把自己当成是他们中的一员，融入其中。
包容他们生活中一些坏习惯，举一个小例子，比如大家一起吃饭的过程中，有一个人晚到的话，他们不会想着要先把餐给这位弟兄（姊妹）留出来再去吃。但你和他们讲明白，他们是可以理解，也会认同照做。他们当中有很多是没有上过学的，可能在家庭中也是缺失很多温暖的，很多生活上是没有常识的。这是一件很小的事情，指出来是希望让他们认识到，我们是一个团体，是一家人，潜移默化中让他们学会关心身边的人。
福音时报：服侍的人应该带着怎样的心？
戴：经文中说“如今常存的有信，有望，有爱；这三样，其中最大的是爱。”所以我个人认为首先是爱心。圣经中也教导我们要学会彼此相爱，爱人如已。
在他们在生活和工作中是常常需要人帮助的。小到鸡毛蒜皮的家庭矛盾，大到生老命病死的突发事件，他们都会第一时间联系我。因为他们一旦信任你和你建立了关系就会把你当成亲人。什么事情都和你分享，向你诉说。所以带着爱心服侍是很重要的。
其次是耐心。服侍的人也要有足够的耐心。近期教会里面有两个姊妹想要和我一起参与到聋人团契的服侍中。其中一个姊妹参与了一次就打退堂鼓了。因为不会手语，没有办法和他们交流，导致她很受挫。早早来到教堂接待，只能把问候写在纸上，但他们很多人又不识字，没有办法直接交流。
做特殊群的侍奉者，是需要有足够的耐心，一方面是对自己要有耐心，进入到这个群体，融入这个群体，了解他们的生活习惯，用语等；同时也要有对这个群体的耐心，对待他们就像对待孩子一样。
最后是信心。从我个人参与服侍来说。从没有接触不了解这个群体，到爱上他们并愿意去更深的服侍他们，这是需要从神而来的信心来托起的。
福音时报：您个人觉得教会在这个群体中应给出哪些帮扶，或者这个群体目前最需要的是什么呢？
戴：生活关怀和灵命成长两个方面。他们在社会是被遗忘的人群，能够来到教会坐在这里，其实他们很多人心理是带着自卑和无奈的，和他们的接触中，了解他们很多是承担着生活的重担和精神上的压力。所以应该给予他们的生活关怀上持续不断的支持和帮助。我们教会在助残扶残这一块是很关注的，逢年过节牧师都会带着同工带上礼物去慰问关怀。
同时也要关注他们的灵命成长，这个可以说是更加重要的。生活上面的关怀和帮助可以帮助和他们建立了很深的亲密的关系，成为无话不谈的朋友，但是发现灵命很难成长。这个也一直是我的一个负担，不知道该怎么办。（编者注：戴姊妹想要自己去神学院学习，得到手语圣经的装备。）目前在尝试做的有，抄写圣经识字，建立手语培训班。
福音时报：您个人服侍中有哪些收获呢？
戴： 一个是我自己的内心变得柔软有爱了。这样的改变我个人是没有想到的，之前的我是一个冷漠自私的人，很骄傲的一个人，心也是蛮刚硬的，但通过服侍他们我开始知道感动，流眼泪，知道爱和关怀了。并且是甘心乐意的服侍。
还有就是通过服侍神成就了我很多的梦想。这个是我没有想到的，从小就梦想当翻译，当老师。看自己现在的服侍，不就是在做老师，在做着翻译的工作吗？很奇妙，神会通过这种方式成就我的梦想，很珍惜现在的位置。
最后是依靠神的心也是信心吧。很多自己害怕不敢去做的事情站在这个位置上有了更多的担当，因为带领服侍他们就要走在前面，他们有需要时能给予帮助。因此在一次次小信想要放弃中，神加给我信心的能力。
所以，服侍者也是被服侍的一个位置，看似是服侍者在付出，我为他们做了什么，但其实是神通过这个位置来真正的服侍了我，医治了我，改变了我。
后记：上文中戴姊妹讲到服侍的人要有爱心，她自身在爱心的服侍上一直坚持做到两个方面，一个是生活中及时给予帮助，大事小情，他们有需要的戴姊妹都会尽可能第一时间赶到，有生病住院的，戴姊妹给自己定的标准是去看望时一定要给他们奉献，标准不低于200元；其次是这些信徒家距离教会相对较远，不能保证每个星期都赶过来，戴姊妹和他们约定，每个月的第一个主日邀请大家无论怎样都过来礼拜。结束后戴姊妹请他们一起吃饭，然后再做个小型的团契，将牧师分享的话语精华拿出来再次与他们交通，让真理更深进入到心灵深处。
【专访】服侍聋人团契4年的湖北戴姊妹：服侍者也是被服侍的一个位置
The deaf community is a vulnerable group in society, and the deaf Christians are now marginalized in the church. Many people find it difficult to communicate with them because of hearing limitations and language barriers. At present, some churches have deaf fellowships and full-time ministry staff to serve them.
Sister Dai (hereinafter referred to as Dai) is now serving in a church in Jingmen, Hubei province. She came to Jingmen in 2018 and half a year later, she started serving the deaf fellowship. As now a full-time volunteer, Dai shared with the Gospel Times, an online Chinese Christian newspaper, some of her personal insights and gains from serving the community, hoping to help those who want to get involved in serving deaf people.
Gospel Times: What things should we know about serving the deaf group?
Dai: The first thing is respect. Each of them is sensitive and vulnerable. They are a vulnerable social group who will encounter some problems in their life and work, including falling in love with someone, which will lead to their sensitive mind, so we should respect them first. Because their living habits and ways of expression are very different from ours, we must get to know them and respect their habits and acknowledge them for who they are.
The second thing is listening. Of course, listening does not mean that we really listen to their voice. It means that we need to care for them, comfort them, and provide specific help for help. As a volunteer of the Union of Volunteers, I find that sometimes our help may not be recognized by them. Why is that? For example, if someone has high self-esteem, they may not want your help.
So listening is understanding their real needs and helping them to the extent that they will accept. A hasty offer of help or the help from the perspective of what we think is good for them would not necessarily lead to good results. It could easily backfire. This can also cause secondary damage to their heart: “Is he/she despising me?”
Another thing is inclusion. During the contact with them, we may find that the word order of their speech is reversed, and their expressions is quite different from ours. For example, have rice, they might say “rice, have”; Go there and play, they may say “play, go there”. In addition, they may show some exaggerated body movements in their expression, which should also be tolerated, because they may sometimes give you different information than you think. So you should use the word order and body language that they can understand. Be part of their group, and regard yourself as one of them, so as to fit in.
Accept the “bad” habits in their lives. For example, if someone is late for dinner, they won’t want to save the meal for that brother or sister. But if you make it clear to them, they will understand and agree to do it. Many of them have not been to school, and may seldom feel the warmth in the family. That would make them lack the common sense of life. These are very small things. We point these things out in the hope that they can realize that we are a group and a family so that they can learn to care about the people around them unconsciously.
Gospel Times: What mindset should the ministry worker have toward them?
Dai: The Bible says, “And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love”.(Corinthians 13:13) So I personally think the first thing is love. The Bible also teaches us to love each other and love others as ourselves.
They often need help in their life and work. From trivial family conflicts to emergencies of life and death, they would contact me immediately. Because once they trust you and establish a relationship with you, they treat you like family. Then they would share and tell you everything. So it’s important to serve with love.
The second thing is patience. The person serving them also needs to be patient. I recently had two sisters from my church who wanted to serve with me in the deaf fellowship. One of the sisters was involved once, but she got cold feet. She was frustrated because she could not communicate with them (she did not acquire sign language). When she arrived early, she had to write her greetings on paper, but many of them could not read and could not communicate directly.
To serve the special group requires enough patience. On the one hand, you should be patient with yourself. You should enter this group, blend into this group, and understand their living habits, language, and so on. You should also be patient with this group and sometimes maybe you need to treat them like your children.
Finally, confidence. From my personal involvement in ministry, it takes faith from God to go from not knowing the people, to loving them and being willing to serve them better.
Gospel Times: What do you personally think the church should do to help this community, or what the community needs most right now?
Dai: Care in daily life and spiritual growth. They are the forgotten people in society. In fact, many of them are psychologically inferior and helpless. Through contact with them, we know that many of them are bearing the burden of life and spiritual pressure. Therefore, they should be given continuous support and help in their life care. Our church pays great attention to helping the disabled. Every festival, the pastor will give some gifts to them with his fellow workers to show sympathy and care.
We should also pay attention to their spiritual growth, which is arguably more important. The care and help in life can help us to establish a deep and intimate relationship with them and become friends who they can talk about everything with, but I find it difficult to help them grow spiritually. This has been a big problem that I can’t deal with. (Editor’s note: Dai wants to go to seminary on her own and get a sign Language Bible kit.) I'm trying to do things like, you know, transcribe the Bible to learn words, and establish sign language classes.
Gospel Times: What have you learned from your personal service?
Dai: First, I have become soft and loving inside myself. I had never expected such a change. Before I started doing this, I was a cold and selfish person, a proud person with a hard heart, but through serving them, I was moved to tears. I started to understand love and care, and I’m serving willingly.
Second, I have fulfilled many of my dreams by serving God. I did not expect this, since my childhood dream to be a translator, or to be a teacher. But my current service is exactly these things! It is wonderful that God can fulfill my dream in this way. I cherish my current position.
Finally, trust in God and have faith. I did many things that I was afraid to do in this position, because we have to do these things to lead and serve them, and we must help them when they need it. So over and over again God gave me the power of faith.
Therefore, serving is also a position to be served. It seems that the servers are giving, that is, we have done something for them, but in fact, God has really served us, healed us, and changed us through these positions.
Afterword: Dai mentioned above that those who serve should be loving and faithful, and she herself always keeps serving with love in two aspects. First, give timely help in life. Dai will come to them as soon as possible when they are in need. If someone is ill and hospitalized, she sets a standard for herself when she pays a visit to them. The standard is donating no less than 200 yuan for each visit. Second, these believers’ homes are relatively far away from the church, so they cannot guarantee to come every week. Dai made an agreement with them that on the first Sunday of every month, everyone would be invited to worship, no matter what happens. After the worship, she would invite them to have dinner together, and then form a small fellowship to communicate with them again with the essence of the words shared by the pastor and let the truth enter deeper into their hearts.
- Translated by Nicolas Cao
Interview: Full-Time Worker for the Deaf Says Serving Is also Position to Be Served
